Two phone messages from Roddy Williams

phone call
i did not hear the phone.
therefore i did not answer it.
i did not  register your question as a serious one.
therefore i answered it with a  lie.
i did hear the phone
but i chose not to answer it,
my motives in  so doing being far
too complex to relate in
this, answered, phone  call.
if you knew why i did not
answer the phone it would not  alter
your or my life to any measurable degree.
so why did you ask?
you  need not answer that question
for the reasons listed above.

message left on voicemail
i won’t be in today
i’m full of it
i think i’m coming down with
a dose of fascism.
i’m feeling right pompous.
i’m hoping it’s just
a twenty-four hour thing
but i’d best not come in…
in case it’s catching.
the doctor says if i
take the moral high ground
he prescribed
and have a good sleep
i’ll be fine by Wednesday.

Roddy Williams lives and works in London. A radical atheist, his Haiku  Diary
of Common Sense can be found at

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